December 2010
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Dear Morning News Shows,
For the love of God, would you please stop testing every freakin’ thing in sight for fucking germs?! Bedspreads, menus, doorknobs, buses, ketchup bottles, pens chained to bank counters. Enough!! I don’t need to know how everything else on earth compares to a toilet. (Plus, you never do say whose toilet. My toilet? Your toilet? Vince Neil’s toilet?...
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Dear Morning News Shows,
For the love of God, would you please stop testing every freakin’ thing in sight for fucking germs?! Bedspreads, menus, doorknobs, buses, ketchup bottles, pens chained to bank counters. Enough!! I don’t need to know how everything else on earth compares to a toilet. (Plus, you never do say whose toilet. My toilet? Your toilet? Vince Neil’s toilet?...
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After all these years, Rachael Ray, I remain thoroughly unimpressed by your absurd single trips from the pantry to the counter. I don’t care how many bowls, onions and cans of fire-fucking-roasted tomatoes you can carry at once. For real-o.
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After all these years, Rachael Ray, I remain thoroughly unimpressed by your absurd single trips from the pantry to the counter. I don’t care how many bowls, onions and cans of fire-fucking-roasted tomatoes you can carry at once. For real-o.
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